Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
