I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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