He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
