he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm too high and old for this...
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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