M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
3pm strippers are depressing
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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