Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
Randomize