I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Randomize
