I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
