Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
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