Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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