She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize