C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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