You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
