Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
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