no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
How external is "for external use only"?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
