He is an equal opportunity slut.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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