Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
