we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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