Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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