life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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