Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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