honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
