Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
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I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
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