we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
