we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
