She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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