My girlfriend figured out who you are.
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
why do cheetos always look like penises
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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