he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
