Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
