i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".