just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize