Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Can't talk, ducks in the car
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
