Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize