I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
