those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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