He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
