im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
