i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
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I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
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The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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