well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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