was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
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