$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
