Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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