I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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