This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
