You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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