Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
He called his prostate his "boner button".
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
soo... how was my night?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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