Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Houston, we have a blender
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Randomize
