Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Randomize
