all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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