You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
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Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
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No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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