i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
My penis needs a shock collar
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
