i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Randomize
